Toxic parents pedestalize the eldest child not out of love, but out of control. By ensuring the institutionalization of the eldest, the remaining “fall in line.” It gives the eldest policing powers over the younger ones, who will rebel regardless.

But it’s always healthier to maintain a Harkness-style discussion, where people can rebel in open, healthy ways, instead of toxic, behind closed doors ways.

Corporations operate similarly. True owners employ dummy CEOs — poster children who look good and smile — but are basically buffer punching bags, taking the hits. And the CEO employs middle-managers — low-life losers who have no real authority outside of their stoop, who inflict pain, fear, scarcity, and shitiness onto their subordinates.

There’s nothing wrong with corporate, team, or family. So long as it’s open, free, and nurturing of independence. When control enters the game, that’s when things get toxic, at first subtle, but insidious.